It has been hard for me being a mom to know who I am called to be. I socialize with variety of moms: career, part time, homeschool, public school, and stay at home moms. It can get confusing by all the varieties and have such huge expectations on what a mother should be. It’s pressuring to hear the statements about mom’s in our culture today: Mom’s don’t have a life, they can’t can’t be ambitious, they shouldn’t work, they shouldn’t be bored, and stay at home moms don’t have a voice. It’s those voices that eat at me that I’m not good enough. That I’m not doing enough for my children. I’m considered selfish if I seek an ambition if it isn’t hundred percent my children. And If I don’t, I’m a failure as a woman for not being anything other than a mom.
Recently, I’ve been readying a little bit about culture. From the start God called out, made out, and drew out the culture that He wanted his children to live by. Unfortunately, people and history have changed and reformed our God based culture. I have noticed how much I have accepted through culture without even realizing it. I have grown to adapt and be numb to some of what our the culture says of us. Coming to understand now, how much I need to renew my mind of who God says I am. Who He says I am called too and what He asks me to believe in. Especially this lie that was really giving me a hard time, ‘ “Women or mom’s can’t be ambitious.” ‘ It is God given for women to dream, be ambitious, and be creative. Since we are created in His image, we inherit his characteristics. He is very much ambitious and creative. This is one of the things I felt relief. It is natural for mom’s to be ambitious and creative.
God has written a plan for all of us mammas and no mother has the same calling. We all have our different callings, which means we must take it to the Lord in prayer. Because I personally, can go crazy confused when it comes to observing different mothers or asking for advice. That’s why I think it has been so good for me to step back and to just seek God in this timing.
I was listening to a sermon while on the tread mill. It was a bad day and I was really frustrated and confused about my purpose and what the heck was I suppose to do! God’s words came out in my mind like plane as day, “You need to seek me right now.” It may not have been the answer I was looking for, but it gave me a goal and a mission. It also gave me a relief that God was listening to me. Because I have been feeling so guilty of wanting to be ambitious to do something. At the same time feeling lost on how to raise my kids and plan my days day after day.
"So I say to you: Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. " Luke 11:9
Slowly, my Father is unraveling healing and understanding. He has closed a lot of doors that has made me frustrating and hurt. This verse might have seemed controversial, but if we look past the selfishness it isn’t. It doesn’t mean he will give us what we want. He will give us exactly what He knows we need and what He can fulfill us with. While I have been writing this, I have come to understand that He was closing doors really to save me from things that wouldn’t have been fulfilling. That He is showing me what I am really seeking. Right now He is showing me true meaning and fulfillment. I am learning to accept the direction He is calling me even if I don’t fully know it yet.
Mother’s are asked to do some hard things. It’s full of responsibility, repetition, and sacrifice. I don’t know about you, but I long for a goal and meaning in my life just as much as I enjoy my cup of coffee. I want to practice my ideas and skills. I desire to not have just meaning in purpose in my home, but outside of it. I think with time and healing God can renew the lies in our mind of what a women is suppose to be, and find joy and meaning in what God has called us to do uniquely individually. No mother has the same calling, so be encouraged, keep the faith, He has given you a meaning and a hope for the future.